D1 Sports Training


Wednesday, July 30, 2008

THE SHOWDOWN: D1 Marketing Staff vs. D1 Nashville Training Staff

This summer D1 Nashville held the inaugural flag football game between D1 Marketing Staff and D1 Nashville Training Staff.

THE SHOWDOWN surfaced on a hot summer, high noon Tuesday in the Franklin, TN facility just south of Nashville. Trash talking had begun weeks earlier between Facility Coordinator, William Bartholomew, and Public Relations Manager, Matt Toy. William and the Training Staff claimed the Marketing Staff sits upstairs in the air conditioning, surfs the internet, checks their facebook status, and are just some added fat around the mid section for D1 Sports. How could the Marketing Staff have any athletic talent?

Little did the Training Staff realize an All Star line up stood across from them on that fateful July afternoon. Line Ups follow:

Starting at....

D1 Marketing Staff:
QB - Will Bartholomew ( Current D1 Sports CEO & former standout Vol Fullback)
C - Matt "Everybody Loves Jason Mathews" Toy
OL - Jaci "Boiler Up" Hills (CURRENT standout in everything & arch nemesis of Corey Remillard)
OL - Cory "Can I get her number" Blankenship (Son to Mrs. Cory Cake Blankenship)
Offensive Specialist - Chris "Never does Carter's Class" Rezabek
Offensive Specialist - Jamie "I follow the Jacqueline Hills Pillars to Success" Bach
Defensive Specialist - Chris "Can't Catch! I'm from the SEC" Regan
Defensive Specialist - Ron "I stole Toy's last Munchkin" Rickel

D1 Nashville Training Staff:
QB - William "Bill" Bartholomew
WR - Ryan "MMMBop" Murphy
OL - Brad "Lil Daniel" Reece
OL - Jeremy "Bobcat"
OL - Alex "Who cares about South Carolina" Nolte
Offensive Specialist - Kendra "I was the only player with stats" Parham
Defensive Specialist - Dan "I wish I played in the Big 10" Murphy (WHAT WHAT)
Defensive Specialist - Brandon "Mr. Olympia" Goebbert

Referee: Carter "Can I get one of those shirts" Hays

DISCLAIMER: To the average reader these starting line ups may seem like the line ups for the Little Giants...but don't be fooled. The game turned into a show that ESPN Classics wish they had footage of for a prime time spot.

As the studs and duds lined up for the first time on that fateful day, The Nashville Training Staff started to feel intensity. They had won the coin toss...but they would later find out... the only way they could win at something was by pure luck and not false athletic superiority. The Marketing Staff continued to move up and down the field with the leadership of quarterback, Will Bartholomew, and the rest of the teams speed, strength, and agility. William and the Training Staff continued to rely on their best player Kendra Parham to get the job down, as she scored the only noteworthy touchdown for the Training Staff.

Key highlights of the game included:
  • William Bartholomew being sacked by almost every member of the Marketing Staff
  • Will Bartholomew to Chris Rezabek winning 50 yd TD pass
  • William Bartholomew throwing an interception
  • Dan Murphy demolishing Matt Toy in the middle of the FLAG FOOTBALL GAME
  • William Bartholomew throwing an interception
  • Carter Hays trying to give all the breaks to the Training Staff
  • William Bartholomew throwing an interception
  • Jaci "Boiler Up" Hills sacking William Bartholomew with continual taunting
  • William Bartholomew throwing an interception
  • Will Bartholomew to Chris Regan 30 yd TD pass over Ryan Murphy
  • William Bartholomew throwing an interception

At the end of the hour long competition, it was clear the Marketing Staff had come to play. The Training Staff realized playtime is over, they need a new baby sitter, and they need to graduate to Pull Ups.

Stay Tuned for the next SHOWDOWN: D1 Marketing Staff vs. D1 Huntsville Training Staff!

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